What Harvard Business School Got Wrong About Women and AI

The real gap isn’t AI adoption. It’s the trap of comparison. Success comes from rewriting your story and rethinking your circle.

When I read the article heavily circulating last week from the Harvard Business Review sharing that women adopt AI tools 25% less than men, I couldn’t stop thinking about why. If you’ve ever hesitated before using AI wondering if it’s cheating, it’s ethical, or if it might change how others perceive your work you’re not alone. The study they shared highlights this exact hesitation.

But the real issue isn’t about adoption of AI tools.

It’s the trap of comparison.

We’re so often measured against someone else’s path - who is using AI faster or who is adapting better, that we miss the bigger picture. Brene Brown corrected Theodore` Roosevelt when she said:

Comparison kills creativity. It’s been said that comparison is the thief of joy, but I believe that comparison is the thief of everything. Keep your eyes on your own paper.

Women have always led with empathy, intuition, and thoughtful decision-making, qualities that have often been undervalued in conversations about leadership and technology. But this isn’t the time for comparison. It’s time to create a new story.

Yesterday’s so-called limitations are today’s superpowers. The very traits that may have once been seen as soft - listening deeply, understanding nuance, leading with emotional intelligence are now what give women a human advantage in a world increasingly shaped by AI.

At a time when all the rules are being rewritten, one of the most dangerous things to do is hold on to narratives from the past. Whether it’s school or life how we define success must change. It is never about keeping up.

It’s about the story we tell ourselves about life, work, leadership, and what it means to move forward. And here’s the part that most people miss: To change your story, you need to change your circle, not just the AI tools you use.

Bruce Feiler said it best in his book - Life is in the Transitions:

Life is the story you tell yourself. But how you tell that story - are you a hero, victim, lover, warrior, caretaker, believer matters even more. How you adapt that story, how you revise, rethink, and rewrite your personal narrative as things change, or go wrong in your life matters even more.

Before You Master AI Tools, Master This

At a time when AI tools are becoming spaces that feel safe, where people turn for answers, guidance, and even connection, this moment calls for women to lead. You only have to open a newspaper to see what happens when men alone shape the world’s biggest decisions 😉

Trust is being built, but without women at the forefront, that trust risks being misplaced. AI will reflect the priorities of those who design it, and if we’re not leading, we’re letting technology make the decisions for us. This is our moment to ensure AI isn’t just powerful, but ethical, human-centered, and inclusive.

As Marian Wright Edelman said

You can’t be what you can’t see.

Representation matters not just in leadership, but in the people we surround ourselves with. The right circle doesn’t just inspire you, they show you what’s possible.

So if you’ve ever felt held back, before you try mastering AI, first change your circle so you can change your story.

Today, I’m sharing my power circle of women with you. Because I know even if they don’t know you they want to see you win. And if you follow them, they’ll welcome you openly. They want to see you lead this new era with your empathy, your caution, your ethics, your integrity, and your intuition, because these are the exact leadership qualities today’s moment calls for.

Follow these women, and I promise you won’t just stop second-guessing yourself. You’ll start imagining possibilities you never even dreamed of.

And the best part? When it comes to execution, you don’t have to do it alone. You’ll have the people and the AI tools to support you every step of the way.

Inside My 2025 Power Circle

My Sisters: 2025 started with the people who taught me the meaning of a power circle - my sisters. I don’t know what life is like without this kind of support and I hope I never have to. Before you can imagine what’s possible, before you can step fully into your own power, they are the people who see it in me first. The ones who believe in you when you can’t quite see it for yourself. Who remind you, again and again, of what you’re capable of not just through words, but in the way they show up for you, push you, and refuse to let you play small.

Jennifer Womble: The Kind of Energy That Makes Dreams Reality

They say to surround yourself with people who say your name in rooms you’re not in. But Jenn didn’t just say my name, she put me on a stage. Her energy is infectious, the kind that makes even the craziest dreams feel within reach. She doesn’t just believe in possibility she creates it, for herself and for everyone lucky enough to be in her orbit. When you’re around Jenn, you don’t just feel inspired, you feel unstoppable.

Juliana Finegan: Proof that We’re Never Meant to Do This Alone

Some people have superpowers. Juliana has a set of them. And when we combine ours, it’s nothing short of magic. Because with her, it’s not just about collaboration, it’s about amplification. About seeing what’s possible when we bring out the best in each other. Oh, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned? The best ideas happen when Juliana is in the room… because there are donuts involved. I can’t mention Juliana without also mentioning the incredible Beth Holland who introduced us. While I haven’t seen Beth in 2025, she’s always on my speed dial and the person I go to when I have ideas that need a mind that even ChatGPT can’t compete with.

Dr. Kelly May-Vollmar: The Kind of Leaders Who Believes Agency is for People

I’m not sure people realize how important this is at a time when AI companies are focused on giving agency to machines. It’s the kind of thing when I watch her I see history being made because Kelly is a leader focused on giving agency to you. She doesn’t just lead, she creates the conditions for others to step into their own power. She knows that real innovation happens when people feel ownership over their choices, their ideas, and their future. With Kelly, you don’t just feel supported, you feel ready. Because when she’s in your corner, you’re never waiting for permission to step up. You already have it. And while there are so many examples I’ve had the privilege of seeing the culture and outcomes it creates in working with Tiffany Norton and her entire team, Nancy Velador, Gabriela Llamas and so many others.

Tiffany Norton: The Kind of Leader Who Designs for the Future

Tiffany understands what every memorable leader does - leadership isn’t about being the loudest voice in the room, it’s about knowing your team, reading the moment, and making thoughtful decisions that stand the test of time.

She doesn’t rush to react. She pauses, reflects, and challenges the status quo, ensuring that what she builds isn’t just for today but for tomorrow. Her leadership isn’t about quick fixes, it’s about long-term impact. In that way, she embodies the vision of Desert Sands: the future is here. And she isn’t just passing this on to her team, she’s passing it on to the next generation. I had the pleasure of meeting her daughter, a future leader who will grow up seeing firsthand what it means to lead with wisdom, integrity, and vision. Tiffany is shaping the future, not just in the systems she designs, but in the legacy she leaves behind.

Nancy Velador: The Kind of Leader Who Makes Sure You’re Seen

Nancy doesn’t just say your name in the right rooms, she makes sure people see what you do. She leads with a deep belief that recognition isn’t just about words, it’s about action. She lifts others by amplifying their work, making sure their contributions aren’t just noticed but valued. Her leadership is the kind that inspires without needing the spotlight. She creates space for others to shine, ensuring that no one goes unseen. With Nancy, you don’t just feel supported, you feel like you matter. And that changes everything.

Gabriela Llamas: The Kind of Leader Who Empowers the Next Generation

Gabriella understands that agency starts with identity. She doesn’t just advocate for student voice, she creates the conditions for young people to see themselves as leaders, decision-makers, and architects of their own futures. Working alongside her at Desert Sands Student Agency Day, I saw firsthand how mentorship isn’t just about guidance, it’s about creating real opportunities for students to step into their power. Gabriella doesn’t just believe in the next generation. She gives them with the confidence, tools, and agency to lead right now. And in a beautiful surprise we learned that we both have a shared inspiration and mentor - Susie Lopez Guerra (who owes me a coffee date 😉).

Before we continue: Writing this, I feel nothing but gratitude. Gratitude for the women who have shaped my year, for the way they lead, and for the proof that mastering AI tools will never be as powerful as connecting with the right people. If anything, I’m even more convinced of what I wrote at the start: success isn’t about keeping up, it’s about who you surround yourself with.

Jennifer Schumacher: Proof That Your Vibe is Your Tribe

Jennifer is a top 1% real estate agent in AZ She doesn’t just talk about relationships, trust, and decision-making, she lives it. We had never met, yet she welcomed me into her tribe without hesitation, bringing together women to learn, lead, and take on AI with confidence. I still can’t believe we didn’t get a single photo, probably because we were too busy doing exactly what she does best: creating space for powerful connections. And I couldn’t have asked for a more inspiring start to 2025.

Chelsea Peitz: Teaching You To Turn Stories into Trust Online and Offline

Twelve years later, and we finally met. Our connection started through stories, sharing them, listening to them, and knowing that trust is built when voices are truly heard. When Chelsea recommended me to Jennifer for the AI event, it was yet another reminder that technology doesn’t limit relationships, it amplifies them. The right people, the right connections, and the right moments aren’t about algorithms; they’re about the trust we build over time. And a special shoutout to Mason, who I’ve watched grow up online, proof that some connections, no matter where they start, only get stronger.

Ann Kozma: The C-Suite Create Titles For Her: Chief Hugging Officer

When a woman leads the way Ann does, the world doesn’t always know what to call it. Because she’s not just leading, she’s redefining what leadership looks like in a world with AI. That’s why, when I had to choose someone to write the foreword for my book, there was only one person. Ann. The one I wanted you to hear from first. Because her energy is infectious, her vision is bold, and the way she moves through the world proves that leadership isn’t about fitting into old titles, it’s about creating new ones and bringing everyone along with you.

Tara Menghini: The Kind of Leader Who Turns Doubt Into Motivation

When I was at a crossroads with my book, questioning its impact and wondering if anyone would care, Tara became a turning point for me. Her unwavering belief in the potential of technology for everyone, regardless of age or background, gave me my motivation. She embodies the idea that technology is for everyone, anytime, and her children are fortunate to grow up with her and the belief she instills in them. When I need a trusted partner who can lead with trust, empathy, and serendipity - she is the first person on my list. Catch us at the AI show!

Heather Brown: Shaping Empowering People to Shape Their Future with Words

Heather is my editor, a math teacher, and so many other things I couldn’t even begin to list. But if only every English teacher was like this. The Slack messages she sent while reading my book made me think if this is what assessment felt like every single kid would frame their papers not throw them in the trash. Her kindness, patience, and intuition for what needed to be done only reinforced what I know to be true, these are the strengths that help us design the future. Can’t write this without mentioning Alaina Clark Weinstein. We haven’t met yet (change that please), but your impact is deeply felt and you were reallyyyyy missed.

Harmony Briscoe and Deanna Rutter: Leaders Who Prove That Foundations Shape the Future

I started my career in their district, and years later, I returned as a keynote speaker, watching Harmony and Deanna lead an AI launch that was nothing short of extraordinary. Innovation isn’t just about bold ideas; it’s about building something that lasts. In a world where many want to move fast and break things, women like Harmony and Deanna know that the foundation, though often invisible, is what makes success possible. The details matter. The systems matter. The people matter. And because of their leadership, this district isn’t just adopting AI, they’re creating an infrastructure that will empower students and educators for years to come. Didn’t catch her name but this amazing principal was sharing how she is leading the way with building GPTs with her team.

Alice Lee and Lori Manz: The Women Who Make Balance Look Possible

They say women can’t do it all. Meet Alice and Lori. They balance leadership, life, and everything in between, making it look effortless, not because it’s easy, but because they lead with intention, grace, and a deep commitment to those around them. As Simon Sinek says, “Leaders eat last.” And that’s exactly who they are, women who put in the work, lift others up, and prove that success isn’t about doing everything alone. It’s about doing it right.

Jenith Mishne, EdD: Building the Future Before Others See It

Jenith and I first connected when ChatGPT launched, back when many were hesitant, but she was already looking ahead. A leader who didn’t just see what was coming before most were ready to confront it, she started building what would come next. Her AI plan, modeled after the New York subway system, is nothing short of brilliant. It’s a perfect example of how empathy and creativity shape the future, making AI accessible, intuitive, and built for the people who will use it. She doesn’t just talk about creating entry points, she builds them, ensuring that no one is left behind in this next wave of innovation.

Lisa Moe: Leading, Learning, and MOEtivating the Future

Whether you are big or small, Lisa doesn’t just motivate, she Moetivates. She leads while learning, proving that growth and leadership aren’t separate, they’re inseparable. Spend five minutes with her, and no teacher will say I’m “just a teacher” again. She pushes boundaries, redefines what’s possible in education, and shows up with the kind of energy that makes everyone around her believe they can do more. That’s the kind of role model every young person needs, someone who isn’t just preparing them for the future, but showing them how to shape it themselves.

Robyn MacNair: The Warrior Who Champions the Arts as a Foundation in an AI World

Robyn is the definition of a Sparketype Warrior, relentless in her advocacy, unwavering in her belief that creativity is not optional. In a world increasingly shaped by AI, she knows that the arts aren’t just important, they’re foundational. Creativity isn’t a luxury; it’s what fuels innovation, critical thinking, and human connection. And Robyn doesn’t just believe that, she fights for it, making sure that every student has the opportunity to create, express, and build a future where the arts and AI work together, not apart. I mean just look at how everyone leans in and listens to her.

Kathy Phan: Proof That The Future of Education is in Good Hands

People choosing this profession in 2025 are extra special humans. Teaching has never been easy, but stepping into it now, at a time of immense change takes a rare kind of commitment. People often tell me I inspire them, and if the inspiration I feel from Kathy’s presence and watching her is what I give others, I can’t imagine a better feeling or a better career. Watching her in the classroom is a reminder that the future is bright, even when the world seems to be crumbling before our eyes. Her rapport with students, her professionalism, and, above all, her commitment to learning will make her irreplaceable in a world with AI. Because great teachers aren’t just about what they know, they’re about how they continue to grow. This opportunity would have never been made possible without the incredible Rebecca Pianta.

Rebecca Pianta: The Counselor Who Always Finds a Way

Rebecca doesn’t just guide people, she advocates for them. Even when someone says no, she finds a way to open doors, create opportunities, and ensure that no one is left behind. Her work is a reminder that leadership isn’t just about solutions, it’s about persistence, creativity, and never accepting a dead end as the final answer. In a world that too often puts up barriers, Rebecca proves that the right kind of counselor doesn’t just help you navigate the system she changes it.

Dr. Eme Flores and Jennifer Crabtree: The Connectors Who Make Innovation Possible

Eme and Jennifer aren’t just leaders, they are implementing the strategies that bring people together to accelerate change. Eme has been driving technology in education for decades. AI isn’t new to her at all, if anything she helped write the playbook on what it means to integrate technology into education to create equitable outcomes for all that put kids on a path to opportunity and access.

Great leaders bring the right people together to connect the dots. Jennifer is the linchpin the Coordinator of EdTech at West Covina Unified who will be the glue that holds it all together (no pressure) it’s people in these roles who when more ambitious are the one who makes sure ideas don’t just stay ideas, but turn into action.

Dr. Nyree Clark and Edrina Fraijo: Moving Mountains with Patience and Purpose

Equity, opportunity, and empathy aren’t just buzzwords for Nyree and Edrina, they’re the foundation of how they lead. When everyone wanted to ban cell phones, they turned to empathy. Instead of reacting with restrictions, they did the slow, patient work of understanding the real problem and designing a better way forward. That’s the kind of leadership that makes a lasting impact. The kind that turns challenges into opportunities, not by moving fast and breaking things, but by listening, adapting, and building something better. It’s also what gives women a unique superpower, the ability to see what others miss and create solutions that truly work for everyone. I don’t see any men down below… do you?

Michelle Ament: Connecting People, Ideas and the Future

Michelle doesn’t just believe in artificial intelligence—she believes in human intelligence. In the power of people, connections, and the kind of learning that happens when we come together. She builds community both online and offline, creating spaces where ideas grow, people feel seen, and learning is a shared experience. In a world racing toward automation, Michelle is a reminder that technology should amplify human connection, not replace it.

Noor Altoma: Turning Big Ideas Into Daily Actions

I just met Noor, and within minutes, I could see the kind of educator and real estate agent she is, the kind who makes the intangible feel doable. At their core real estate and education are relationship businesses. For example we all know how powerful affirmations are, but Noor doesn’t just talk about them, she teaches you how to use them. She’ll tell you exactly what to write, where to place the mirror, and how to make it a habit. These aren’t just words; they’re granular strategies that turn mindset shifts into real change. These are the kinds of things only a truly gifted educator can teach, making the big, fluffy ideas actionable, repeatable, and real.

Bobbie and Lena: Teaching You Self Care is About Strength and Confidence

Bobbie trains my body. Lena styles my hair. But what they really do is so much more. Both of them meet people from all walks of life, giving them a unique sense of empathy that goes far beyond their professions. They don’t just make people look good, they make them feel good, inside and out. And in the process, they’ve taught me more than I ever expected, reminding me that wellness isn’t just about strength or style, it’s about the people who lift you up along the way.

Pain, Resilience, and the Power to Rewrite Your Own Story

Now let’s get personal. If you made it this far I’ll share a personal struggle I’ve been dealing with lately. I know how much stories matter. At the heart of stories and how people connect with us is vulnerability. When my parents got divorced in my 20s I lost every friend I had grown up with the past decade when I moved from London to California. I realized how many of my friendships growing up through our community were an illusion. A culture where relationships are based on assumptions. I struggle with sharing this story and these experiences without having them define me. So for now I’ll say this. We had a really toxic mother. A concept that for a Southeast Asian culture where men are usually the ones who are the toxic ones, it was so hard for anyone to imagine it could be reversed. So when us four sisters stayed with our Dad, to say our community and friends vilified us would be an understatement.

I remember constantly saying why are people so dumb. How do they not even wonder why four girls would make the same decision. And I often say that were it not for this experience, when I first learned about design thinking I don’t know if the concept of empathy would have resonated with me at such a deep level that allowed me to build what I have today, and create the impact I do.

This is what Jensen Huang means when he says, “I wish on you pain and suffering.” This is what he told students during a talk at Stanford, “I believe that suffering and resilience are essential for success. He thinks that people who have high expectations without experiencing setbacks may lack resilience when faced with adversity. He also believes that character is more important than intelligence in determining success.”

I would never be who I am today without that pain and sufffering, yet I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. For that reason this next group are extra special. These are the handful with a character that transcends the stereotypes, the bias, and the confines of society. And I hope this entire post shows you that today anyone can rewrite the rules, and anyone can change how their story is being written.

Sheena Messick: The One Who Will Teach You How to Write Your Own Rules

No one writes their own rules the way Sheena does. She stands up for what’s right, speaks up when it matters, and moves through the world with a conviction that makes you feel braver just by being around her. She’s also the friend who always has you share your location, because looking out for people isn’t just something she does, it’s who she is. And if you’re lucky enough to have her in your circle, you know that means everything. We landed together at an apartment building in San Mateo as strangers, and today are the best of friends. So when I was in her home state Florida this January of course we had to meet up.

Jen Carey: The Kind of Woman Who Shows You What It Means to Never Settle

Working with Jen at Apple, one thing became clear, you have to know women like this. Women who don’t settle. Who push for more, expect better, and refuse to accept anything less than what’s possible. But not every space is like this. The only way to find, filter, and attract these kinds of environments is to deeply know who you are, what you believe, and commit to never stopping your own learning. Jen is proof that when you do, you don’t just end up in the right rooms, you help build them.

Sarah and Nazeeha: The Kind of Women Who Remind You Who You Are

If you only had these two friends, you wouldn’t need any others. Not just because we love a good spa day and amazing good. But because they are there in every high and every low, not just supporting, but showing up in a way that makes the impossible feel possible. Their inspiration isn’t just in what they do, but in who they are. They remind you of your own strength when making the tough decisions feels impossible. And in a world that constantly tries to shape you, they’re the kind of friends who make sure you never lose sight of yourself.

Annie and Schehrezade: Proof That Friendships Can Be Built at Any Age

People say it’s hard to make friends later in life, but that’s only true if you’re looking in the wrong places. When you share energy, values, and a drive to lift each other up, friendships don’t just happen, they expand what’s possible. With Annie and Schehrezade, it’s about more than just connection. It’s about trying new things, creating trusted spaces, and navigating this wild thing we call life together. Some friendships take years to build. Others fall into place exactly when you need them most.

This post would be incomplete without sharing the women who I haven’t met but who online have connected with me weekly to inspire, to uplift, and to design what’s next.

Angela Magill - my daily dose of motivation! I can’t wait till that energy goes from Instagram to us walking the streets or the beaches of Australia.

Dr. Maduli-Williams and Dr. Dennehy - every time I see you post I wish I had you both when I was in school. Your relentless innovation, passion, and creativity is so inspiring and seeing what you have both done to bring AI to your learners is the exact leadership examples we need today.

Sophia Mendoza - you are one of my favorite people on the plane and especially in the world of IG. Cheating with this one because while it wasn’t this year it was one of my favorite memories.

Stacy Kratochvil - I cannot wait to see you this month and I am so proud of the work you lead, the creativity you bring to others, and the advocacy you do. Thank you internet for bringing us together

Janice Case - always showing up for everyone at work and at home, while showing us how to take care of ourselves as well. You are such a freakin inspiration and an amazing role model for anyone around you.

Dr. Jenn Overstree - for inspiring me so much with your stories and your writing! I hope we get to meet soon and till then everyday your posts bring me so many insights and reflections.

Lisa Dabbs - my mentor since day 1. Haha also my neighbor and your ongoing support means the world.

Gail Ross McBride - this entire post would be incomplete without you because you were literally the SPARK that set this whole thing alive. Love you!

Create Your Power Circle: The Future is Built with People First, Then Products.

If this post proves anything, it’s this: you are not defined by the limits the world tries to place on you. Not by outdated expectations, not by old narratives, and not by the voices that tell you to compare yourselves to others. The women in this post don’t wait for permission. They lead, create, and lift others up. They prove that success isn’t about keeping up, it’s about who you surround yourself with and how you choose to show up.

So if you’ve ever felt stuck, let this be your sign: create your Power Circle. Find the people who challenge, inspire, and push you toward the future you deserve. Because no matter how fast technology moves, no matter how much the world changes, one thing remains true:

The future is built with people, not products. Happy International Women’s Day.